FIx Me

it's here again. it wasn't planned nor wanted but either way it is here again. the feeling that i've been running away from. and don't tell me to face it because i did. and it's here again.

in my dreams you torment me. you were always there. maybe it's what i wanted but it's not helping. ideas, you give me a lot of them. it's never needed but it still comes. i don't want to think anymore. every time i think i think about your birthday, impossible pathetic dates, what could have been, and what is happening. i'm lost.

i hope it ends tonight.